with the concept of Nikaah...
I learned about Nikaah from Madrasa when I was a child. I have seen it happen in my family many times. Then I had to study (by heart) marriage laws in India during my Masters.
For those who don't know, Nikaah (Islam Marriage) is a social contract between the bride's male guardian (father or elder brother/uncle in father's absence). The bride's signature is obtained beforehand and hence the presence of the girl is unnecessary.
Since I always preferred staying home or doing something else to attending weddings, I was all for the concept of Nikaah when I was a child. It meant that I could curl up with a book instead of dressing up and attend weddings because girls/women are not required to attend it.
But now I chafe at the sheer injustice. No matter from which angle I look at it, it seems unfair.
Take selling your car/property to another, for instance. Isn't this exact change of ownership happening in traditional weddings? Let's try and word it like - Father/Guardian giving the daughter as wife. Even replacing the word 'selling' with 'giving' doesn't gloss it over for me. The similarity makes me shudder.
Of course this is no different from Kanyadaan or walking the bride down the aisle. That is why I think that the Indian Constitution is awesome with its Special Marriage Act.
I never dared to say all this before. But I have to. I feel that my pride is at sake. My honour too. Everything I believe in is at stake.
BECAUSE I AM NOT A PROPERTY. I'M A HUMAN BEING!
I learned about Nikaah from Madrasa when I was a child. I have seen it happen in my family many times. Then I had to study (by heart) marriage laws in India during my Masters.
For those who don't know, Nikaah (Islam Marriage) is a social contract between the bride's male guardian (father or elder brother/uncle in father's absence). The bride's signature is obtained beforehand and hence the presence of the girl is unnecessary.
Since I always preferred staying home or doing something else to attending weddings, I was all for the concept of Nikaah when I was a child. It meant that I could curl up with a book instead of dressing up and attend weddings because girls/women are not required to attend it.
But now I chafe at the sheer injustice. No matter from which angle I look at it, it seems unfair.
Take selling your car/property to another, for instance. Isn't this exact change of ownership happening in traditional weddings? Let's try and word it like - Father/Guardian giving the daughter as wife. Even replacing the word 'selling' with 'giving' doesn't gloss it over for me. The similarity makes me shudder.
Of course this is no different from Kanyadaan or walking the bride down the aisle. That is why I think that the Indian Constitution is awesome with its Special Marriage Act.
I never dared to say all this before. But I have to. I feel that my pride is at sake. My honour too. Everything I believe in is at stake.
BECAUSE I AM NOT A PROPERTY. I'M A HUMAN BEING!
Special Marriage Act is awesome...
ReplyDeleteTrue Greesh... Wonder why people dont make use of good laws!
DeleteActs will make some difference, but not much simply because we are experts in finding loopholes and/or in doing things clandestinely. What will make a big difference is people standing up and challenging unacceptable traditions. You have correctly said, "I never dared to say all this before. But I have to." The next step is to implement it and to spread the message.
ReplyDeleteOf course I will implement it. No doubt about it. But wish people would just think! It can't be that hard. If I can overcome conditioning and draw logical conclusions, anybody can.
ReplyDeleteThanks for dropping by.
This comment has been removed by the author.
ReplyDeleteIf thats true, then I cant wait. Thanks for dropping by, Pagan.
DeleteIt really takes a lot of courage to stand up against the traditions. I applaud your guts, good luck!
ReplyDelete